Roundup: Elon Musk’s dream of robot slaves isn’t coming soon

Tesla’s Cybercab isn’t going to change much at all other than keeping the cult absorbed in Elon Musk’s aura. But the underwhelming event the company put on Thursday evening didn’t just feature the sorry robotaxi prototype. It also continued to push another deceptive narrative Musk has been trying to use to inflate Tesla’s share price and make it seem like anything other than a slowing car company these past couple years.

After first appearing as an actor in a spandex suit in 2021, the Optimus robot was on display once again on Thursday. For Musk, it’s supposed to be an example of how Tesla is not just going to transform the roads with the autonomous vehicles he’s been promising for a decade, but also with humanoid robots that nearly everyone will eventually want to buy — or so he claims to investors.

During the event, Musk presented the Optimus robot as little more than your personal slave. “Whatever you can think of, it will do,” he told his adoring followers as they shouted how much they loved the fascist billionaire. Rows of Tesla employees flanked a line of Optimus robots ready to engage with the gullible cult members, after which Musk pointed out they’d also be dancing and serving drinks for the attendees’ enjoyment.

It didn’t take long for Tesla fans to start posting videos of themselves have conversations and getting served at the bar by Optimus robots, expressing their amazement at how quickly Tesla had advanced its robot tech. But once again, it was a deception.

Observers were quick to point out it sounded like the Optimus robots were simply voiced and controlled by humans hidden somewhere nearby. Tesla fans responded to those comments defiantly, but they were true. Robert Scoble, best known for his photo wearing Google Glass in the shower, posted to Twitter/X that he had it confirmed that the voices were those of Tesla employees, who were also remotely controlling the actions of the robots as they worked the bar. Tesla has even showed off how the robots can be controlled by humans wearing haptic suits in the past.

Elon Musk is trying to convince investors and his cult that humanoid robots capable of doing virtually anything you ask are right around the corner. As usual, he’s trying to deceive everyone with a vision that won’t arrive for many years, if it’s ever realized at all.

This week in the roundup, some great recommended reads. I love knowing about the complexities of domain names, so when I saw an article about how the .io domain may end up being sunsetted, it was an immediate addition to the list. Find that, some other recommended pieces, along with labor updates and other news you might have missed below.

I was interviewed on Trashfuture and the Engadget Podcast this week about Data Vampires, a new series I’m in the process of releasing over on Tech Won’t Save Us about the consequences of hyperscale data centers for communities, the climate, and the future of our society. It’s getting great reviews so far, so please check it out! New episodes will drop every Monday for the rest of October.

Plus, I also spoke to Pulitzer-prize-winning author Spencer Ackerman for the regular Thursday episode of Tech Won’t Save Us, where we talked about the past year of Israel’s attacks on the people of Gaza and how the region has become a “laboratory for future warfare” that won’t be contained to Israel and the neighboring countries it’s bombing.

Have a great week!

— Paris